Fic: A Dream Second. Bart Allen. G.

[museofspeed]

Title: An Dream Second
Fandom: DCU
Characters: Bart Allen
Prompt: for fanfic100: 59. Food, for random_30: 19. Life is but a dream.
Word Count: 362
Rating: G
Summary: Bart is dreaming...
Author's Notes: Oh god, the crack. This is from an RP and I am so cheating by posting it here because it's only Bart/Tim in the sense that Tim is mentioned but it's awesome and I wanted to share it and also I'm so close on my Bart/Tim table that I CARE NOT. Plus it's 2 AM and I'm tired. So. Take a peak into Bart's dream... IF YOU DARE.



Bart is throwing peanuts at a poster that is talking about chocolate chip cookies which they have to rescue from the bad guys but when they get to the evil fortress Max tells them that Bart's peanut butter is in another sandwich and there's Carol and she's telling him that he's a superstar and then Bart's playing Baseball like he did that one time with Carol and watching the ball as it goes through the air in slow motion so that by the time it gets to the plate he can hit it into space where they're roller blading and there's Carol again and she's smiling about something but every time Bart asks what she's happy about she just laughs and tells him that their teacher's gonna be mad if he sets the paper on fire again and now he's running running running running running running running running running running running running running running running running and there's Wally and he's telling Bart he's disappointed again and blah blah blah Bart just wants to run and now he's a supervillain but secretly working for the good guys and now he's all cramped up because everything's small and he's being forced to stay totally still and Inertia is laughing at him and Bart gets so mad he starts running again up Inertia's stupid face and hits him but then he explodes and Max is reminding him that it's very important never to leave the lawnmower on all night so that no one learns that Bart Allen is secretly Impulse because superheroes don't leave their lawn mowers on. Then he and Preston are eating cheeseburgers with Robin and Superboy and Bart's trying desperately to keep them from noticing each other because SECRET ID and if Preston finds out everything will be bad ever and then Cissie shows up and shoots Bart with a chocolate arrow which is good because he suddenly remembers that cheeseburgers are made by the Question and isn't he a bad guy or something so he starts eating the chocolate and then Helen is yelling at him for not eating his plate and then he's running again.

A second has passed.

Comments

[faile-neume.livejournal.com]

Shana you are crazy.

That was amazing.

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

Running on four hours of sleep makes writing Bart's dreams easy!

Thank you. :-)

[saavikam77.livejournal.com]

Holy crap. O_O *falls over from exhaustion from just reading that*

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

Hahaha. Yeeeeah, it was fun.

[shigeki-jkp.livejournal.com]

BAAAAAAARRRRRRRRTTTTTT!!!!!

That's all the response I have...That made me laugh an go WTF all at once. That's an Impulse dream for sure. Ahhh great stuff ^_^;

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

Heeee. Thank you!

[iesika.livejournal.com]

THAT WAS THE BEST FIC EVER!

Oh god, seriously. Best look into Bart's head ever. I can't even quote the best bits back at you because it's ALL ONCE SENTENCE OMG.

I'm going to try anyway. You made me laugh out loud at the following points:

• but when they get to the evil fortress Max tells them that Bart's peanut butter is in another sandwich
• and there's Wally and he's telling Bart he's disappointed again and blah blah blah
• and Max is reminding him that it's very important never to leave the lawnmower on all night so that no one learns that Bart Allen is secretly Impulse because superheroes don't leave their lawn mowers on.
• and then Helen is yelling at him for not eating his plate

LOOK BULLETS.

I really, really loved this. I had this whole conversation (with faile_neume, I think?) about how I can't get into Bart's head AT ALL. You obviously can.

The peanut butter line is STILL making me laugh.

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

HEEE! I'm glad you liked it so much! Yeah, I RP him so I've practiced. Being in his head is tiring, but I can do it. Writing this was basically a matter or letting my fingers follow my brain. That's the best way to write Bart. Oddly, it's the same for writing Deadpool, but then I'm allowed to have the R-rated thoughts. Bart can't. But thank you!

[iesika.livejournal.com]

*points at icon*

Bart begs to differ, about those R-rated thoughts.

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

Not at the point I'm playing him, he isn't!

[glymr]

Whew...I...oh, poor Bart. I mean, I guess he's used to it, but DAMN.

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

Heeee. It's normal for him! Everyone else is slow!