Various writing ficlets!

[museofspeed]

Title: Avocado
Rating: G
Pairing: Harley/Ivy
Author's Note: Ah, Harley and Ivy.


"Hey, Red, guess what's in my coat pocket!" Harley shouted, crashing into the greenhouse.

Ivy gritted her teeth. "What is it?" she snapped. "And make it quick. I'm working on an important experiment."

"Geeze, I wouldn'ta bothered if I thought you'd be so mean about it, Pammy," Harley said.

"Harley..."

"No, no, it ain't like I'm important. Maybe I'll just go back to the Joker. He cares about you."

Poison Ivy carefully put aside the plant toxins she was working with and turned to Harley. "He's tried to kill you repeatedly!"

"That's how he shows his love!"

"That clown - " Ivy took a deep breath. "Look, Harl, I'm sorry, okay? What were you going to show me?"

Harley grinned and pulled a pit out of her pocket.

"An avocado seed," Ivy said dryly. "This is what you wanted to show me?"

"Well, I know you like all kindsa plants, and it was that or throw it away an' then it would just die, so I thought I'd bring it to you."

Ivy looked at Harley. The clown seemed torn between hope and worry. "Well," she said. "Give it here. I'll put it in some water to get it started."

Harley grinned widely. "Gee, you're the best, Red!" She bounced forward and grabbed Ivy into a bone-crushing hug.

Ivy groaned. She was already regretting humoring Harley.

Title:Dead Ant
Rating: PG
Pairing: Bruce/Selina
Author's Note The title amused me too much not to use. I don't know when this takes place, but it's not current canon, clearly.


"Catwoman."

Selina did not jump as Batman melted out of the shadows. She'd been practicing not being scared by him.

"Batman," she said, smirking. "Thought you might show up here."

"Put down the diamond," he growled.

"This?" Selina asked, dangling the pink-tinted diamond in front of her. "But it's so pretty!"

"The Pink Panther diamond is too important for me to allow you to walk out with it."

"Now, now." Selina slunk over to Batman and ran a hand down his armored chest. "I'm sure we can...work something out."

"Selina - "

"Shhh." Selina wrapped an arm around his neck and kissed him, feeling his mask digging into her cheek.

Batman put an arm around her waist and kissed her back. Selina almost regretted slipping the handcuffs out of his belt and locking his other wrist to the emerald exhibit.

Almost.

She pulled back slowly, and grinned. "Later, Batman," she said, jumping out the window.

She knew it wouldn't take him long to pick the lock, so she put as much distance between the two of them as possible as quickly as she could.

Still...

It would have been nice if she could have stayed. Made love to Batman right there in the museum. Done her time and come out reformed. Maybe Batman could even fall in love with her.

Selina pulled the diamond out and watched the light reflect through it and around her small apartment. It might be nice to dream, but she knew that diamonds were less likely to let her down.

Title:Fire Hazard
Rating: G
Pairing: Spider-Man/Human Torch
Author's Note: This might be the first time I've written these two, but given the prompt, I couldn't resist. Also, woah, short fic.


"Something's burning!" Peter announced, swinging onto the roof of the Baxter Building.

Johnny rolled his eyes. "Funny, Webhead."

"I'm known for my witty quips. What's up, Flamebrain?"

"Going on patrol. Thought you might want to come."

"Sure," Peter said. "But careful. Us friendly neighborhood Spider-Men don't like getting burned."

"I'll be careful. You know I wouldn't want to hurt you."

"Sure," Peter said, jumping off the roof. "Just see if you can keep up!"

Title:Damsel in Distress
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Bernard/Tim/Steph
Author's Note: I was working on Spoiled when this prompt came up. My mind went there. Um, I guess this can count for greeneyelove's threesomes or more challenge?


"Tim!" Bernard yelled into the cellphone. "You've got to come now! It's an emergency!"

"Bernard!" Tim yelled. "I - what's wrong? Where are you?"

"I'm at my house. Oh dear god, the horror!" Bernard rubbed a candy rapper on the mouthpiece of the phone.

"I'm having trouble hearing you!" Tim said. "Look, I'll be there as fast as I can."

Bernard hung up and smirked at Steph. "Think he'll buy it?"

Steph shrugged and started pulling off her costume. "He better. We've worked damn hard to ensure we can give him a threesome for his birthday."

"Indeed. Clever move, bringing Nightwing in to cover his patrol."

"And you know there's no way he would have ever stopped if left to himself."

"That's our Timmy," Bernard said, smirking slightly.

Robin swung through the open window. "Bernard! Steph! Wait, what's the emergency?"

"Oh, look at her!" Bernard said. "Don't you recognize a damsel in distress when you see her?"

ETA one more!
Title: No Healing Factor
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Bart/Tim/Kon
Author's Note: Actually wrote this one a while ago and never really shared it. So here!


"I hate you both," Tim said.

"Weren't you just shoutin' on about how much you loved us?" Bart asked cheerily.

"Yeah, Bart and I don't need you to participate if you don't want to," Kon said. "We've always got each other."

Tim rolled his eyes. "You know I don't mean it like that, guys. I'm just, agh," he fingered the hickeys on his neck. "I have no idea how I'm going to explain this to my parents. Or Batman."

"Oh," Bart said in a small voice.

"I'd like to propose a new rule," Kon said. "From now on we only leave marks on the non-meta where Batman can't see them."

Bart nodded slowly. "That's fair."


In other news, I'm currently almost done with one of my OTP prompts, working on the other two, and working on my xmenfirstclass fic.

I'm also part-way done with the third part of Spoiled. I'd go faster if I didn't have these other things with a due date.

And I'm trying to write my Bart hooker fic with Anita as his pimp where he runs off with Carol, and it's turning out to be severely less cracky and more depressing than it ought to be with that description. I'm not sure if I'll keep writing it or start over and make it lighter and funnier. Everyone's kind of out of character, but it's not so much because I'm writing them wrong as that I think they'd be different people in this universe. Bart is not a happy, innocent kid because he's living on the streets selling his body for money. And Anita-the-Pimp is damn tough. Carol's herself, though.

Comments

[anthraciteowl.livejournal.com]

I love the way you write Bernard/Tim, and bringing Steph in just makes it better. They'd have to do something like that to get Timmy to take a night off!

Selina made me sad. Because she's right: the diamond probably won't let her down the way the Bat would.

And Spider Man and the Human Torch were really funny, even though I don't know either of their stories. They sounded sort of like Robin and Speedy (back when they were Robin and Speedy, not Nightwing and Arsenal.)

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

I love the way you write Bernard/Tim, and bringing Steph in just makes it better.

That's my feeling! What's better than Bernard/Tim? Obviously, Bernard/Steph/Tim!

And I'm still possibly writing an alternate universe fic where they are the hit band Robin and the Spoilers that may all be sleeping with each other.

the diamond probably won't let her down the way the Bat would.

Poor people. I need to write more Justice Verse. Like, now.

And Spider-Man and the Human Torch were really funny, even though I don't know either of their stories.

They're Marvel. I'm not that familiar with them either, but I've picked up enough to get by with.

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

Also I added another. (http://shananagin.livejournal.com/68412.html#cutid5)

[anthraciteowl.livejournal.com]

I like it! Those three are always so cute. Tim's lucky his lovers are still afraid of Batman, otherwise he'd have to find a new threat.

Robin and the Spoilers? Awesome. Tim should be the lead singer, crooning ballads with his bangs hanging in his eyes. Or whatever way you have it worked out.

I'm definitely in favor of more Justive 'Verse. It makes the DCU a better place.

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

He is the lead singer. Bernard's on drums and Steph's on electric guitar.

They've got songs like "Not Another Crisis!" and "Tortured with a Powerdrill," not to mention their hit single, "Everyone I Love is Dead."

And then I start making up songs which their mentor, the famous singer-billionaire Bruce Wayne, sings.

And then I get them stuck in my head.

[anthraciteowl.livejournal.com]

That sounds great. Tim would be good at emo ballads, at this point in his life. Is "Not Another Crisis!" an upbeat song about all the important mundanities that get interrupted to go save the world? Or is it another angst-fest, like "Everyone I Love is Dead"?

Meta-fandom: when you're singing the song you wrote for Bruce Wayne over and over.

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

Meta-fandom: when you're singing the song you wrote for Bruce Wayne over and over.

It's an awesome song!

"Are you dense? (bumbumbumbum)
Are you retarded or something? (bumbumbumbum)
I said, are you dense? (bumbumbumbum)
Are you retarded or suh-umthi-ing
I...am...the...goddamn Batman!
I...am...the...goddamn Batman!"

That's the chorus. Verses haven't been written because, well, at that point I realized I should at least pretend I have a life.

"Not Another Crisis!" is more upbeat. Sort of dry humor. Showing that the normal crisises in our lives are nothing when compared to giant company crossovers.

[anthraciteowl.livejournal.com]

That is a fine song indeed. I mean, how many billionaires are there in Gotham in the right age bracket with the right body type and hundreds of scars from "skiing accidents". It's not that hard, people!

Funny! It's good that Robin and the Spoilers have something to sing besides angst ballads. Who will Bruce sing with? Batman and the Robins? Brucie and the Orphan's Chorus?

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

Batman clearly is a loner. He's not the type to pick up orphaned children and train them to fight crime, or anything. Nosirreebob.

I actually had a whole history plotted out. Bruce Wayne has released albums with Tim, Dick, Steph, and Jason. Dick's moved on to work with the hit teen band "the Titans," and Jason died from some wild partying disease known as "Crowbar." Steph worked with the band Birds of Prey (run by former star and current businesswoman Barbara Gordon) before moving on to sing with Robin and the Spoilers. Bernard learned a lot from his mother, the singer with a cult following known as the Mighty N. Dowd. She's, well, mightily endowed.

Yes...I thought too much about this.

[anthraciteowl.livejournal.com]

Of course. All the Robins must have been created in some illegal, psuedo-scientific cloning experiment. Wait . . .that one's a Super.

Sounds great. Birds of Prey would make a great girls band. Is Babs the frontwoman or the producer? Dinah's the lead singer, right? If Jason died from a rockstar disease called "Crowbar" (shudder), did Steph suffer from one called "Powerdrill"? Or is that just one of Robin and the Spoilers' songs?
Of course Nina Dowd gets a following. She started as a nightclub singer, yes?

I encourage you in your cracky ponderings.

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

YOU WILL SLAY ME!

No, Steph didn't die. She just was whisked out of the public eye by the prestegious Dr. Thomkins to recover from a rabid fanboy attack. (He was wearing a black mask).

Babs is the producer. Works behind the scenes, though she used to be a singer.

Tim produced an album called "Young Justice" with Bart "Impulse" Allen, "Super" Conner Kent, Cassie "Wonder Girl" Sandsmark, Anita Fite, Secret Hayes, Cissie King-Jones, and the punk rocker known as Slobo. Unfortunately, Bart and Conner both suffered massive losses in sales, leading to the death of their record deals. It's very sad, but with the upcoming music crisis, it's thought that they might make a comeback.

[anthraciteowl.livejournal.com]

Thank you? I'm sorry? Oops?

Good. Steph shouldn't die, even by rabid fanboy attack. I'm glad Dr. Thomkins took care of her. Who's Dr. Leslie Thomkins? The attached physician, who cares for the musicians while they tour? Who is Alfred Pennyworth? You can't leave him out!

Great! What's the up-coming music crisis? The unexpected fusion of several previously separate music styles?

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

Alfred is Bruce's manager, of course. And his general care-taker/butler. He's exactly the same! But musical.

Leslie is kind of not herself at all. She's the wealthy physician who is paid a great deal of money to take care of wealthy pop stars.

The upcoming musical crisis? Well, it'll be the day when the rapper Darkseid wins a Grammy.

...you do realize that maybe an eighth of this will actually show up in the fic, right?

[greeneyelove.livejournal.com]

I loved these, but and yes, Bernard/Steph/Tim is perfect for the challenge!!!

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

Hooray!

It's possible there will be more threesome fic. But no promises. Hellishly busy and sometimes my threesomes don't end up as threesome-ish as I'd like them to be.

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

Also I added another. (http://shananagin.livejournal.com/68412.html#cutid5)

Which does work for the OT3 thing, conveniently.

[greeneyelove.livejournal.com]

I adore it! I love Bart/Tim/Kon. And you write them so well. Makes me want to go smack Didio for killing off two of the boys and leaving the other depressed.

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

Makes me want to go smack Didio for killing off two of the boys and leaving the other depressed.

Do it. And video tape it. You'll be a hero.

[rocaw.livejournal.com]

These are great!!

The Bernard/Tim/Steph made me happy! And the Bruce/Selina one was so them! Love the handcuffs thrown in, too! =)

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

Who doesn't love handcuffs?

Glad you enjoyed!

[bradygirl_12]

All great!

I especially liked the Harley/Ivy and Bruce/Selina fics, and Johnny/Peter is amusing! :)

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

I enjoyed the Bruce/Selina. Man, Catwoman's fun to write. There may be more of her here in the future.

Glad you liked!

[timemonkey.livejournal.com]

Loved the Johnny/Peter and Harley/Ivy ones.

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

[timemonkey.livejournal.com]

You're welcome. Harley's voice really came through strongly with that one. ^_^

[stinglikeabee.livejournal.com]

Love 'em! 'specially the last one :D

I wonder what excuse Dick had for his hickeys as a Robin.

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

He told the Titans they were from a training exercise, obviously.

[seacrystal.livejournal.com]

Pink Panther diamond, lol. That had just made my entire day. I suddenly have this image of Bats and Pink Panther together.

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

I couldn't resist. It's cat themed!

[saavikam77.livejournal.com]

These were adorable! ^_^ I especially loved the last two. :p Tim is pretty much a goner, no matter who he winds up with! XD

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

Poor Tim. His threesome partners are so inconsiderate. Taking him off patrol and leaving hickeys...tsk.

[dariclone.livejournal.com]

That Harley/Ivy was *so* funny, as was the Selina/Bruce. I'd never read Peter/Johnny before but I like it also.

[museofspeed.livejournal.com]

Oh, thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed them!

Haha, these are old!